They Call it Acting

One of the things that has happened in the two years that I've been in Los Angeles is that I've made more money "acting" than I ever have before. And in that time, I've done less "acting" then ever before, leading me to wonder just what "acting" is.

When I became serious about this career, I had the unshakeable belief that to act was to explore and share the human condition with an audience in an authentic and novel way. I was a behavioral scientist, presenting my findings of character and crisis to a live crowd. I could effect people. This, I felt, was important work. I was not simply an entertainer. I was part of a movement, I was trying to change the world. I was connecting to people, and as a beloved acting teacher once told me as if it was scripture, "only connect."

My last job was a Wendy's ad. I didn't change anything. I did get a lot of text messages from friends I hadn't heard from in awhile when it aired. I guess that's connecting.

Last year, I played an Internal Affairs Detective, a Honda Salesman, a guy at a dinner party, a security guard,  bartender, a rapid sports fan, and an office worker. Rarely did I explore the human condition, and if I did, I was hawking some product or other. I don't really feel like I've done any acting - which involves things like collaboration, creativity, challenges, discovery, personalization. Instead, I've been filling in a small gap in other people's creative vision, I've been fitting the bill. I match what someone sees in their mind, hopefully add to it, and they hire me.

This is not what I set out to do as an actor, and I'm not actually presenting any findings of fact here. I guess I just wonder what one calls this thing I do. Cuz I don't think it's called acting.